Monday, June 28, 2010

Frugal Cocktails

Throughout June, I've been telling you how to make some classic summer drinks, like the Margarita, Sangria, Long Island Iced Tea, and my own concoction, the Aphrodite. To make some of these drinks, maybe you've had to buy a few ingredients you didn't have, such as triple sec, blue Curacao, or tequila. Maybe you're wondering what else you can do with them and all those left over mixes and juices? So this week I'm going to show you how to make ten more summer drinks from the ingredients you have on hand.

That sour mix you made for Long Island Iced Tea? Last week I mentioned how you could use it (made with added lemon instead of lime juice) to make a Margarita. It will taste slightly different, but maybe you'll prefer it.

And remember our Margarita recipe? Well, you can make a Blue Margarita, just like in chi-chi Tex-Mex places. Simple: just substitute blue Curacao for the triple sec in the recipe.

You can make a Hawaiian Margarita by combining 1 1/2 ounces tequila, 1 ounce orange juice, and 2 ounces of pineapple juice. Serve blended or on the rocks.

How about a Pineapple Daiquiri? Blend 2 ounces white rum, 1/2 ounce triple sec, 3 ounces pineapple juice, and 1/2 ounce lime juice with ice until slushy. Serve in a Margarita glass and sip through a straw. Tip: if you don't have Margarita glasses, large bowl, red wine glasses make good substitutes, especially for frozen drinks.

Or try a Blue Lagoon: 2 ounces vodka, 1 ounce blue Curacao, 2 ounces pineapple juice, and a teaspoon of triple sec. Shake with ice in a cocktail shaker and strain into a martini or margarita glass.

Why not use those Collins glasses for a Tom Collins? Over ice, combine 2 ounces of gin and 1 1/2 ounces of sour mix. Top off with club soda. Substitute vodka for gin and you have a Vodka Collins. Tastes a lot like Smirnoff Ice or Mike's Hard Lemonade. Like Mike's Hard Cranberry? Just add a couple of ounces of cranberry juice as well.

Gin and Tonic is the quintessential summer cooler: 2 ounces of gin over ice in a Collins glass, fill with tonic, and add a squeeze of lime. I still remember the first one I ever had. It was made with Gordon's gin and that's still the way I like my G&T.

Rum and Coke, also know as a Cuba Libre is just as easy to make: 2 ounces of rum (white, amber, or dark) over ice in a Collins glass, fill with cola. Add a squeeze of lime (optional). I always think of my friend John when I drink these. I prefer mine with dark rum and without lime, but he always specified Bacardi (white), with a slice of lime in his. Only, his were much stronger!

Well, those are some of the basics. You can have the summer off, or for the more adventurous, follow the blog as, each week, I feature some of summer's more interesting cocktails, such as the Mojito and the Mint Julep.

Have a Happy Canada Day and a great summer! Cheers!

Monday, June 21, 2010

Coffee: The Right Drink for Canada?

HUNTSVILLE -- A report released today by the Tazer Institute concludes that coffee beats education when it comes to helping voters make the right choice. Estimates of its effect ranged from a small regular trumping a community college diploma, to an extra large double-double besting a Ph.D.

Rumours had been circulating since the 2008 federal election, when pundits claimed that the Harper Conservatives' success at the polls was due to their appeal to "the Tim Hortons drinking" segment of the electorate.

Speculation increased late in 2009 when Harper was a no-show at the United Nations, instead touring the Tim Hortons Innovation Centre in Oakville.

Observers sensed something was brewing last week when Quebecor Media launched its Sun News channel, dubbed "Fox News North". Dressed in a $3,000 suit, Quebecor Media vice-president and former CBC pundit and communications director for Stephen Harper, Kory Teneycke, explained, "We will offer the type of raw debate Canadians only find today in coffee shops."

Speaking at a news conference held at the $2 million drive thru specially constructed to host the G8 summit here, a spokesperson for the Institute explained how it had arrived at its findings. "We simply counted the number of Don Cherry bobbleheads in pickup trucks idling in coffee shop drive thrus. The number was highest in Conservative ridings. It was a no brainer, really."

Strangely, the effect was not observed in those who consumed coffee drinks with names ending in "-ino". "They tend to live in cities and take public transit," he explained, "Need I say more?"

A representative of the Canadian Taxcutters Federation confirmed the Tazer Institute findings. When asked what his group's studies had shown, he stated, "We don't need no academic elites doing 'so-called' studies. We know we're right. It's just common sense."

Friday, June 18, 2010

Tea Time

Over the first three weeks of our summer cocktail series, with the margarita, sangria, and Aphrodite, we're covered blended, on the rocks, punches, and shaken drinks. There's one other category of popular summer cocktail, and that's the long drink. And what better example than the Long Island Iced Tea?

Long drinks are served in a tall, cylindrical glass capable of holding about 350mL, or 12 ounces. They're usually called Collins glasses because of their association with the long drink of that name. We need a tall glass so there's room for lots of ice and a carbonated mixer.

The Long Island Iced Tea is all about balance, as you will see. It's a drink with a large number of ingredients and you will find some variation in recipes (as well as local names for the variations) if you go hunting on the internet. Here's my version, which is the result of many hours of rigorous testing.

Because of the small amounts of several of the ingredients, I find it easier to make up a double batch. You'll see why. Start with a glass measuring cup. Add 1 ounce each of vodka, gin, white rum, silver tequila, and triple sec. I told you there were a lot of ingredients. Don't leave any out, and be careful to measure accurately. As I said, this cocktail is about balance. Well made, you'll be able to detect the subtle presence of all the elements.

Next, add 1 1/2 ounces of sour mix to the measuring cup. Sour mix is that lemon-lime stuff you see added from a plastic jug in bars. It's often made from powders containing citric acid and artificial flavours and colours. But we don't go in for that stuff. Instead, remember the margarita mix you made a few weeks ago? The one where you added extra lime juice to Minute Maid Limeade frozen concentrate? Well, to make sour mix, follow the same directions, but instead of adding lime juice, add 4 ounces of freshly squeezed lemon juice. You now have a top-quality sour mix.

You'll end up with about a litre. It'll keep a week or so in the fridge and can be used in many other cocktails. Or you can freeze it in an ice cube tray and keep serving-sized amounts in a ziplock freezer bag. Or use the rest to make a slightly different tasting version of the margarita. But if you're like me, you'll probably use it all up making Long Island Iced Tea.

To assemble the L.I.I.T., half fill two Collins glasses with ice. Add half the liquor and sour mix combination to each glass, and top with about 4 ounces of Coca-Cola. Add a straw. Stir and sip.

This is a potent drink and is best enjoyed sitting down, preferably on a deck or dock in a comfortable chair with good company. Cheers!

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Fox Noise North

Yesterday, Quebecor Media announced that it would be launching a right-wing news channel, Sun News, already being dubbed "Fox News North".

Promising "hard" news during the day, and "straight" talk at night, Quebecor's channel is expected to join other right-wing broadcasters such as CTV, Global, and Rogers, all hoping to grab a piece of the lucrative erectile dysfunction advertising dollar.

Details are still sketchy at this point, but Give Me 500 Words has obtained an outline of Sun News' tentative program lineup:

Liberals Make Me Puke!

Law and Order

Are You Smarter Than a First Grader?

Law and Order

Alberta's Got Talent

Law and Order

The O'Leary & O'Leary Exchange

Law and Order

The Good Wife (Belongs at Home)

Law and Order

Why Don't You Learn English?

Law and Order

Two and a Half Tier Health Care

Law and Order

Support Our Troops -- Or Else!

Law and Order

Cut My Taxes!

One media analyst expressed concern that Canada's supply of exclamation points, never very large, might be depleted by the new channel. Sources at Quebecor, however, assured investors that a steady supply could be imported from the U.S.

"We realize that Conservative voters make up only a third of the electorate," stated a Quebecor spokesperson, "but we feel they will welcome yet another right-wing cheerleader. After all, they need to be screamed at regularly by angry white men in suits if they're going to be able to successfully ignore reality. We only hope to be as respected and financially successful as the National Post."

Monday, June 14, 2010

Mike Harris, Ph.D'Oh!

I see where the Ontario Teachers Federation has its knickers in a knot over Nipissing University's decision to award Mike Harris an honourary degree. The very idea has them so unhinged, they've threatened to take out their pique on teacher candidates from Nip U.'s education program.

I say these poor kids have suffered enough. Bad enough their school years were blighted by Mike's "reforms", but now they've got to carry the stigma all their lives of having graduated from an alma mater that granted him an honourary degree. Oh, the Humanities!

Anyway, this isn't a first for Nipissing.

Remember when their Womens' Studies program granted an honourary PHD (Professional Horn Dog) to Tiger Woods for his efforts to assist nocturnal hospitality workers?

And when the English Department recognized Sarah Palin, for "her impassioned eloquence, that speaks to all that's best in Nipissing", well, no one made a peep.

Of course, there was that minor flap over who was going to give the convocation address to the Business School, Conrad Black or Bernie Madoff. That turned out for the best though, as scheduling conflicts meant neither gentleman could attend, and BP CEO Tony Hayward was able to fill in at the last minute.

So to the Ontario Teachers Federation, I say lay off Nipissing, and lay off Mike. This is his one chance to get a degree.

And to all you Nipissing grads readying your commencement outfits, remember: the eye holes go on the front, and paper, not plastic.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Not a Pina Colada Recipe

Who doesn't like fresh pineapple? Its sweet-slightly tart flavour is naturally refreshing. Suggestive of tropical beaches and relaxation, it's a perfect flavour for a summer cocktail. But, while there have always been canned juices available, they taste, well, canned. And manually squeezing fresh pineapple to get juice for a cocktail is a messy, time-consuming, and not very productive business. I know; I've tried it. So the problem for us mixologists is, that unless you have a professional-quality juicer, getting good quality pineapple juice is difficult. That is, until now.

A few summers ago, President's Choice introduced a fresh, not from concentrate, pineapple juice. It comes in a 1.75L carton, and you'll find it in the refrigerated juice section, next to the orange juice. It's a great product.

Something that I really like about pineapple juice in a cocktail, besides the flavour, is that, when you shake it in a cocktail shaker with ice, it produces a layer of lighter-coloured foam on top of the drink, an effect I take advantage of in the following drink recipe.

You'll need a cocktail shaker for this one, as well as a shot glass with markings for accurate measuring of ingredients. Put about a cup of fresh ice in the shaker. I like to use store-bought ice because of its clarity, clean taste, and slow-melting properties. But if you have good water and an ice maker that produces good quality ice, use it.

Add 2 ounces of white rum and 1 ounce of Blue Curacao. Blue Curacao is much like triple sec. It's an orange-flavoured liqueur from the Caribbean island of the same name, but it's tinted blue, and is widely used to give colour to tropical-themed drinks. It's produced by several companies and is not very expensive. Then add 2 ounces of pineapple juice and a dash (about 1 tsp.) of fresh lemon or lime juice. The reason we need the lemon juice is because both the Blue Curacao and the pineapple juice are sweet and the lemon juice not only balances the sweetness a little, it also adds complexity and enhances all the other flavours.

Close your shaker and shake sharply for about 30 seconds. Shaking cocktails with ice does several important things. It thoroughly mixes the ingredients, of course, as well as chilling the drink. (As a general rule, shake until the outside of the shaker is covered in condensation.) Also, some of the ice melts, diluting the alcoholic strength, which smooths the flavour. And in the case of this drink, which contains pineapple juice, it creates that layer of foam I mentioned.

Strain into a martini or margarita-style glass. You'll notice the drink is a beautiful turquoise with the lighter-coloured foam floating on the top.

I call this cocktail the Aphrodite in honour of the Greek goddess of love, who was said to have been born of the sea foam. You, too, may find it inspires thoughts of the sea, or even of love.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Well, I've Never Been to Spain...

Well I've never been to Spain, but I kinda like the sangria.

In Spain, they have a lot of red wine. They also have very hot summers. And they've found a way for the two to live in harmony. It's called sangria, or Spanish for "bloodletting". Not very appetizing sounding, but trust me, it tastes a lot better than it sounds.

It's a wine punch, consisting of dry red wine, chopped or sliced fruit, a sweetener, a little liquor, and in most cases, ice and/or a carbonated beverage. From that basic recipe there are limitless possibilities, including sangrias made with white or rose wines. So you get the idea: nearly anything goes.

I've experimented the last few summers and have come up with a recipe that suits my tastes, so if you come to my house, here's what you'll drink.

You'll need a large pitcher capable of holding at least two litres. Wash a lime, a lemon, and an orange really well and dry thoroughly. Slice them thinly, and if they're large, cut the slices in half. Again, if they're large, I use only half of each fruit. Put the sliced fruit in the pitcher and add two ounces of triple sec (an orange-flavoured liqueur). This provides both the sweetness and the liquor parts of the recipe.

Then pour in a 750 mL bottle of dry, red wine. Stay away from heavy, oaky reds; you want something lighter-bodied and fruity. You also want something cheap. After all, you're adding lemon slices to it, so don't waste an expensive vintage. Despite sangria's Spanish origins, I use an Italian red, Farnese Sangiovese. That's partly because I don't know much about Spanish wines, but the Farnese is also ideal for the reasons I mentioned: it's lighter-bodied and fruity, and it costs only $7.50 a bottle, less if you buy the 1.5L size. Give everything a good stirring.

Put the pitcher (which now contains fruit, liqueur, and wine) in the fridge for several hours. When ready to serve, add two cans (about 710mL) of ginger ale. Serve in large wine glasses over a little ice and enjoy. It makes a refreshing backyard aperitif, since the alcohol content is about half that of wine alone.

There are all sorts of variations. As I mentioned, you can use white or rose wines. You might then use summer fruits like strawberries or peaches. And instead of triple sec, you can try Grand Marnier, or brandy (particularly if the wine is off-dry). You can use Sprite or Seven-Up, which tend to be sweeter than ginger ale, or club soda or sparkling water for a drier taste. It's up to you and whatever your tastes are.

Don't be afraid to experiment: if it's not exactly to your liking, you'll no doubt drink it anyway (I always did), and you'll get closer to your ideal sangria with each attempt. Salud!